


Flashbacks (i don’t want to go on)

by angstgremlin



Series: Time Has Changed [2]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Evil Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Exiled TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Flashbacks, Ghostbur, Good Friend Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt/Comfort, I’d recommend reading the first part to this first :D, I’m writing exile innit again what do you do expect, No beta we die like - oh wait I have a beta woah, Suicide Attempt, Time Travel, Time Travel Fix-It, Traumatized Tommyinnit (Video Blogging RPF), theres a lot of hugging and crying, two dreams pog, yeaahhhhhhhh, yup! We have both
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-16 03:21:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29569533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angstgremlin/pseuds/angstgremlin
Summary: “Dre, how do you know it’s too much?” Tommy asked one day. It was a bad day. They were sitting in the tent as cold wind pushed against the sheer wool walls.“Wh- Tommy what do you mean?”“I just- I don’t want to go on.”—Or, Tommy is getting worse in exile and Dre doesn’t know how to help him before Dream pushes Tommy farther than he can go
Relationships: Clay | Dream & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), No Romantic Relationship(s), problematics don’t interact
Series: Time Has Changed [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2172162
Comments: 27
Kudos: 312





	Flashbacks (i don’t want to go on)

**Author's Note:**

> Um
> 
> So I know is been like, a month. 
> 
> But I’m here! I finally did it! And this is like the best thing I’ve ever written imho so I REALLY a hope you guys like it!
> 
> If you have not read the first part, I recommend you do because otherwise you probably won’t understand it, lol. I wont stop you but it’d mean a lot if you did! :D
> 
> Anyways, thank you [Rei](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arterra) For Beta-ing this work! You caught a lot of stuff I would not have XD
> 
> Quick TW: evil Dream doesn’t make an appearance but his manipulation does! We also have attempted suicide, some panic attacks, and a nightmare sooo if you don’t like that pls skip, I don’t want to hurt anyone <3
> 
> Anyways, that’s all so I hope you guys enjoy this! Thank u!!!

The green-hooded man quickly rowed back to Logstedshire from L’manburg, lost in his thoughts. It had been a little over two weeks since he’d been transported forward into this nightmare of his server and he had yet to see his home until now. 

Cause holy hell that place is a mess. 

He didn’t want to make himself seen, as he wasn’t sure if Dream would be there or if anyone would realise he’s not… their Dream. 

But as he darted through the land he used to think was home he couldn’t even recognize it. 

Sure, his place has never been the cleanest or the prettiest (cause who can beat the Hermitcraft server when it comes to building) but it had also been his own chaos of a town. His close friends messing around and living together. 

But even though the prime path was still there, and Church Prime was still standing strong, most of it was unfamiliar.

Such as the town built over a smoking crater, telling a story he barely knew.

But Dre was now rowing back, two days later, having seen enough, and was making his way back to his own personal mission.

Keep that kid from dying. Or worse. 

(and Dre had been gone far too long already. He feared for the kid’s mental state since the first day.)

\---

_ Dream woke up with a crick in the neck and a far too thin boy asleep on his lap. At first, confusion clouded his mind but it was replaced with care for the boy who was softly snoring as he remembered the previous day's events. _

_ Dream wanted to curl up and fall back asleep, if only to not wake Tommy, but he knew he needed to investigate the area a bit, not having time yesterday with his future counterpart shadowing this land.  _

_ But he still had the clingiest boy in existence (Tommy would  _ always  _ deny that but everyone knew that he couldn’t stand to be apart from Tubbo for too long) still attached to him. _

_ Well, Dream had had to shimmy out of a spontaneous team cuddle party turned nap time plenty of times before, this shouldn’t be too hard.  _

_ However, the man underestimated his opponent, and the  _ second  _ his feet touched the ground after untangling himself from the cot Tommy fidgeted and woke up, much to Dream’s chagrin.  _

_ Also to Dream’s chagrin, the blond stared wide-eyed at him, most likely thinking him to be the present counterpart of himself.  _

_ “No no no, Tommy it’s fine, it’s me, from the past, remember?” Dream consoled Tommy. It took a few seconds for the sleep to clear from his eyes but luckily, he untensed and slowly sat up from the cot. _

_ “Sorry bout that Dr- Dream.” he apologized.  _

_ He assured him that it was fine and they continued on the day. Tommy gave him a tour of his home and recapped the past events as best he could. It was that afternoon while eating some fish Dream had caught when he realized something. _

_ “Hey Tommy?”  _

_   
_ _ “Yeah D- uh, Dream?”  _

_ “Why do you have a hard time saying my name?”  _

_ Tommy flushed and looked down, embarrassed.  _

_ “Uh, sorry I just you- I keep- fuck- thinking it’s you- like, present you. And your not him but I- whenever I say your name I think it’s fuckin present you or something,” he explained. _

_ “Oh.” Yeah, that adds up, Dream wondered why he didn’t realise that before. “Do you want to call me something different? Like a nickname or something I dunno.”  _

_ “I- you don’t have to. I don’t want to be-”  _

_ “No no it’s fine!” Dream interrupted. “We could do like uhhh, Dre? Like short for Dream.” he offered. _

_ “Rhymes with Clay.” Tommy snicked. _

_ “Pfft, exactly. Call me Dre, then it won’t be as hard to talk about present-me too.”  _

_ “Okay  _ Dre _.” he laughed. _

_ \--- _

He could see the shore of the beach now, only barely. Something was wrong, he could tell. Though, that feeling had been plaguing his brain for a while. 

Dre could tell that him being there helped Tommy. And he was able to help him regain his possessions after Dream left. But Dre knew that every moment he wasn’t there Tommy spiraled. His head still listened to Dream’s manipulation and venomous words, making him believe he had nobody.

Tommy wasn’t the only one spiraling at the moment, unfortunately.

While at L’manburg he had caught sight of his old friends. Sapnap and George, still together. No Dream in sight.

They were certainly his friends, but he could tell they changed, just as everyone else had in this server in the last two years. 

George, the once loud, sarcastic, bratty best friend was now subdued. He looked numb, as if he wanted nothing more than to go home and sleep all day rather than deal with the shitstorm of this place. 

Sapnap was also subdued, but differently. He had a burning anger. The fire in his eyes that sparked with joy now glowing with betrayal and pain. He stood slightly in front of George as they walked - as if he wanted to protect him. 

Dre didn’t blame them. He couldn’t see Dream. He figured there was no way the two would stand to see him be that way. He only wished he knew what future him did to them.

No matter, however. Dre was still planning on decking the motherfucker.

He shook the thoughts from his head and peered at the shoreline of the beach. Now that he was closer he could see something was  _ very  _ wrong.

He couldn’t see the tent.

He was only gone for two days.

_ Why couldn’t he see the tent? _

He rowed faster.

It was raining.

\---

_ “Why do we need a bunker?” Tommy asked from outside the small cave Dre was carving out. _

_ “So that we can gather supplies Dream can’t blow up. If we want to win against that bitch we need better stuff. That dude has full netherite!” He carved out a bit more of the cave before placing down a chest and filling it with the few extra tools he had on him. _

_ “But why would we want to fight Dream? He’s my friend?” Tommy argued weakly. Dre sighed, the jerk-faced ass of a future him (he’s not you, he’s not you) had been there just an hour ago and was so bitchy Dre started angrily mining this hold.  _

_ “Dream is  _ not  _ your friend Tommy. He’s only trying to hurt you. He may seem nice but he’s not. He blew up your stuff for god's sake!” Dre shot back, angry at Dream. He tensed when he saw Tommy flinch at his words. Fuck, he forgot he still sounds just like the guy, even if he tried his best to not appear as him. _

_ Hence the discarded mask, hidden in his pack in order to not freak the kid out. As well as the discarded hoodie, now tied around his waist instead. He wanted to replace it, but it wasn’t like he was carrying around his closet when he was brought here.  _

_ “Fuck, sorry Tommy. I’m mad at Dream, not you, trust me. I won’t hurt you like he did.” Dre promised. Tommy nodded, still looking at the ground. Dre sighed and pulled himself out of the bunker, about to cover it up when Tommy stopped him, grabbing his arm. _

_ “Wait can I- can you put something in there?” he asked. Dre nodded and Tommy brought out some photos that had been folded in his satchel to hand to him. _

_ They were pictures of Tubbo. Dre smiled and added them to the store. _

_ \--- _

Dre lept out of the boat as he reached close enough to shore, not even bothering to put it away. His shoes, already wet from the rain, were now soaked from the ocean but he could care less. 

It was gone. 

The tent had exploded.

Where was Tommy?

\---

_ “Ghostbur, what is it like to die?” Tommy asked the ghost dining with them around the campfire. Both Ghostbur and Dre froze at Tommy’s question.  _

_ “What?!” Dre yelled, ghostbur glared at him and turned to Tommy. _

_ “Why do you ask?” the ghost questioned. While the ghost obviously wasn’t all there, and didn’t remember a majority of his living life, he still retained his brotherly instincts from what Dre could tell. Though to be honest, he didn’t really know the guy when he was living. Only added him to the server because Tommy begged and Dre figured if anyone could keep the chaotic child in check it was his older brother.  _

_ But now, two years later, he was dead, and Dre hardly knew why. Tommy didn’t like talking about Wilbur unless it was before-Pogtopia days. _

_ “Uh, I dunno, just curious.” Tommy answered hesitantly. Dre glared at the ghost, trying to telepathically tell the spectral being to be careful what he says next. _

_ “Well, I don’t remember much of my death,” ghostbur began. “Just that I was happy. There wasn’t really any ‘light’ or ‘road’ or something. I was alive, and then I was not, y’know?”  _

_ “Oh,” Tommy said, “do you… do you like being dead? Would you rather be alive?”  _

_ “No, I don’t want to be revived. Alivebur was not a good guy, nobody likes him. I’d rather just stay a ghost, y’know?”  _

_ “Oh. Okay.” Tommy fidgeted with the hem of his shirt. _

_ “But being alive is better than being dead wouldn’t you say,  _ ghostbur _.” Dre challenged. The ghost cocked his head at Dre. _

_ “Oh yes, I would say so. Just not for me. I’d rather be dead.” He answered in that annoying high pitched raspy voice of his. _

_ “I was just curious Dre, don’t worry.” Tommy laughed nervously at the still tense man. Dre sighed and nodded. Tommy looked back at the fire.  _

_ \--- _

Dre ran towards Logstedshire, past the broken portal, and collapsed to his knees at the completely destroyed area. 

It was all gone.

Blown up.

Tommy was nowhere in sight.

Dre stood up, looking around the area before his eyes caught on the hill.

And the one block pillar disappearing into the sky.

\--- 

_ There were some days Dre thought Tommy was getting better. He would laugh, he would shout, he would swear, and cause mischief. Those were the best days, where Dre could laugh along with and they’d chat amicably as they built or gathered or just had fun. _

_ But there were other days where Tommy would barely get out of bed. Eat little to nothing unless Dre practically forced him to take a bite of food. He would flinch when Dre spoke and spiral if he left for too long. Those days he would listen to the red music disc for hours. Only stopping if Dream arrived and he had to put it away in fear of Dream taking it away from him. _

_ Dre knew that the bad days were getting more often, and he didn’t know how to stop it. _

\---

“TOMMY!” Dre screamed up at the sky as he shakily climbed up the muddy, slippery hill to get closer to the tower. “TOMMY ARE YOU THERE?” 

No no no no no this can’t be happening. Dre  _ knew  _ he shouldn’t have left. He shouldn't have but he had to know what happened. 

  
Why did he go, why did he go?

“TOMMY!” He screamed again. He squinted up, the rain pelting his face, but he could just barely make out a figure sitting at the edge of the pillar.

\---

  
  
_ “Dre, how do you know it’s too much?” Tommy asked one day. It was a bad day. They were sitting in the tent as cold wind pushed against the sheer wool walls.  _

_ “Wh- Tommy what do you mean?”  _

_ “I just- I don’t want to go on.” _

\---

“Tommy please!” He screamed up. He couldn’t tell if he could hear him. “Tommy don’t jump! I’ll come get you! I’m here!” 

The figure dropped a sheet of paper. 

\---

_ “Tommy what are you doing?” Dre asked the teenager. They were in the nether for netherite. Dre started to dig into the wall. Tommy was still on the path. Looking down at the lava. _

_ “The lava’s warm,” Tommy answered. Dre narrowed his eyes in worry.  _

_ “Yeah, we’re in the nether. It’s always warm.” He stepped towards Tommy slowly so as not to spook him. _

_ “I haven’t felt warm in forever Dre.” _

\---

“TOMMY!” Dre shouted, still clambering up the hill. It seemed so far. He was shaking. The wet mud keeping him from gaining a hold.

Tommy fell.

\---

_ “Why did nobody come? I made invitations! Not even  _ you  _ came Dre!” Tommy sobbed. Dre inhaled sharply. _

_ “Tommy, you know I couldn’t, Dream would have seen me. That’s why you told me to go mine,” Dre argued weakly, trying to comfort the boy. _

_ “But Dream was the only one who came. Nobody else cared. Nobody cares about me but Dream,” Tommy mumbled, curling in on himself. _

_ “Tommy,  _ I  _ care, I’m trying to help you!”  _

_ “That’s  _ exactly  _ what Dream said! You always say I can’t trust him but you say the same things!” Tommy yelled at Dre.  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “I’m sorry! You know he means it differently, I don’t want to hurt you!” Dre shouted back. _

_ “DREAM I CAN’T DO THIS ANYMORE!” _

\---

“ _ TOMMY!” _ Dream raced towards the bottom of the pillar. 

Icarus was falling.

\---

_ “Tommy,” Dre whispered. Tommy called him Dream. _

_ “I can’t… I don’t want to do this anymore Dre…” _

\---

Closer.

Dre dumped a water bucket on the ground.

Closer.

\---

_ “I wonder if Tommy’s doing alright,” Tubbo asked Fundy as Dre watched them go down the prime path towards L’manburg.  _

_ “Eh, it’s Tommy. He’ll be fine. Probably building more of his towers now that he has more room.” Fundy answered indifferently. _

_ “Yeah, you’re probably right.”  _

\---

Dream felt tears trickle down his face with the rain. 

Closer.

He held out his arms.

  
\---

_ “Tommy I’m so sorry,” Dre whispered. “You don’t- You don’t deserve to go through this Tommy.”  _

_ “It’s- It’s all my fault.” he sobbed in reply.  _

\---

Closer.

Dre caught Tommy and they both fell to the ground from the momentum. The water from the bucket blanketing the fall. 

Dre sat up slowly and wiped the water from his face. Tommy was shivering on him.

“Tommy, Toms are you okay?  _ Please Toms.”  _ he cried, holding Tommy’s cold body close to his.

\---

_ Dre woke up to Tommy shaking in his sleep. The boy was mumbling words he couldn’t make out. _

_ “Tommy?” Dre asked, sitting up quickly. He didn’t respond. Only fidgeting more. A tear escaped from his closed eyelids. _

_ He was having a nightmare. _

_ “Tommy! Tommy wake up bud, it’s just a nightmare!” He told the boy. Were you allowed to touch people having a nightmare? Would that make it worse? _

_ “Wilb’r no, don’, please don’ hurt m” he murmured painfully.  _ Fuck it _. Dre grabbed Tommy’s hand. _

_ “Tommy wake up, it’s Dre, I’m here, Toms wake up.”  _

_ That seemed to have done it, luckily, and when Tommy gasped with the sudden wake up, tears pooling in his eyes, he grasped Dre’s torso and hugged him, shaking with tears. _

_ “I’m here, I’m here, it was just a nightmare Toms don’t worry.” Dre comforted. Tommy sniffled. _

_ “Wilby… Wilbur used to call me Toms…” he whispered hoarsely. Dre’s eyes widened.  _

_ “I’m sorry, do you- do you not want me to call you that?” _

_ “No it’s uh… It’s fine. It’s nice.” Tommy answered. Dre tightened the hug. _

\---

Tommy breathed a sob and Dre almost broke down then and there. 

_ He’s alive. _

“Toms, are you hurt? Are you okay? Why- you-” Dre stuttered. Tommy clutched Dre closer.

“Why did- why did you- you catch me?” Tommy cried. His heart  _ broke. _

“Tommy you can’t- You can’t die, Toms, so many people care about you, we need you to live bud.” Dre wasn’t qualified to do this. He didn’t know what to say to convince the boy that he shouldn’t die. 

How do you convince someone who’s going through worse than death to not die?

“Tommy I’m so sorry. I don’t know the full of what happened. You’ve gone through so much. But I care for you, I can’t let you die. Not like your brother. You’re worth so much more. Please. I won’t leave your side again I promise.” Dre wiped the water from his face. He wiped the water from Tom’s face as well.

Tommy scooted up a bit, and nodded.

\---

As soon as the rain ended and the two had cried all their tears, Dre helped Tommy up and they stumbled away from the ruins of the exile. 

The fall wasn’t without consequence, and Dre knew that Tommy had probably bruised a lot of his body, even with his own to break the descent. Tommy had a slight limp as well, and suffered from a lot of burns.

Probably from the explosions that future him set off.

_ (He’s not you, he’s not you, he’s not you) _

Dre barely knew where they were going. Tommy had mentioned that his brother Technoblade lived in the tundra, but the biome was huge. There was no guarantee they’d find the warrior in time.

But as Dre held Tom by the arms as they left the nightmare of Logstedshire, he knew he’d do anything to keep the kid safe.

And if that meant killing his future self to do so, then he wouldn’t even hesitate. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> If you made it this far, TYSM! It means so much and I hope you liked it!
> 
> I meant to also include the ‘going to technoblades house’ part in this but I wrote so much I decided to split the into different parts, so that’ll be what’s next so subscribe if you want notifs for when that happens!
> 
> I have a [twitter](https://twitter.com/angstgremlin3) so if you want bad memes and the occasional art pls follow me there! I post hints to future works there as well!
> 
> And finally, I write for myself and not for validation, but if you enjoy this PLEASE kudos and comment, it makes me smile and encourages me to write more! Thank you <333
> 
> (Also I totally forgot to add but the sheet of paper Tommy dropped was one of the photos of Tubbo he managed to save)


End file.
